


Gratitude

by BandaBecca



Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 12:23:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13458183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BandaBecca/pseuds/BandaBecca
Summary: It isn't just nightmares of the archdemon which plague her one night in camp. After she wanders away, she learns she doesn't have to be alone.I also post my work on my bandabecca Tumblr if you have an inkling to check it out!Thank you for reading!





	Gratitude

That night she didn’t dream of the archdemon, but of home. Her mother and brother being torn apart before her eyes while a faceless nobleman watched on—cutting the points from their ears first before cutting pieces off everywhere else. She woke, choking down a cry and a hand unsteadily seizing her left wrist as she fought to pull it from their grasp. Her other hand desperately scrambled into her pack to close around the hilt of her knife. Even feeling the cool leather in her hand, fear shot down her limbs and the tips of her hair. She raised the blade between her and the figure, but made no move to strike, scrambling for a tactic against them but finding her mind suddenly empty. But then the figure backed away, their arms up.

‘I’m sorry! It’s all right, it’s just me. Just Alistair.’

She didn’t lower her weapon, her breaths fighting to leave her lungs.

‘You’re in camp,’ he continued, hesitating before gesturing around them.

Camp? 

Camp.

Her chest rose and fell. To her left Bodahn and his boy were sleeping under their wagon, and behind them Morrigan’s fire crackled in her corner. A few feet away from her, Leliana’s head was poking out of her tent looking at them both, clearly concerned. 

She must have shouted in her sleep again and woken the others. She glanced back to Alistair, his figure finally taking full form in her mind as the fog cleared. ‘Alistair?’ It was a whispered question between gasping breaths, a search for assurance.

He smiled at her, but his eyes weren’t shining like they normally did. ‘Morning. Well, probably morning.’ His neck craned up to look at the stars. ‘I’d guess that the time is probably about-’

She stopped listening and checked over herself. She didn’t feel pain anywhere so probably hadn’t harmed herself like that time when she dreamed of Hurlocks clawing up her arms, waking with scratches up and down them. Her knees felt weak, her breathing still rapid, and her hands were shaking, one wrapped around Alistair’s forearm. She pulled it back, not remembering having placed it there. 

He stopped talking then and looked down where her hand had just been. ‘We were both asleep, but I hadn’t been dreaming of…was it not the archdemon?’

She swallowed and shook her head, not able to look him in the eye. ‘I’m going for a walk.’

She was a few steps away when she heard his quiet, ‘All right.’

She wandered into the trees and didn’t stop until she felt far enough away not to be heard. Not that it mattered. She didn’t cry loudly. She didn’t make any sound at all, just like her mother had taught her. Just stared across the wood as far as she could see.

She blinked and wiped her nose when she heard movement behind her. It took no deep concentration to recognise Alistair’s footsteps pounding like a giant's. 

She didn’t turn as he stopped to stand next to her, both watching a different far-away something in the distance. He stayed silent himself, perhaps finding words.

He was silent longer than she'd ever hear him before eventually, ‘I’ve never seen dragon shit, but I hear it’s quite impressive.’

A laugh pushed its way out, and she relaxed her shoulders at last, running a hand through her hair, the melancholy spell broken, even if only slightly. ‘How am I still able to be surprised by what comes out of your mouth?’ She looked over to him to find him watching her in return.

His eyes slowly sunk into seriousness. ‘If you want to be alone, just say the word.’

She took a deep breath for courage and shifted slightly, pressing her back against the warmth of his chest. She pressed her lips together and held her breath, waiting for his reaction. They had never touched this way, never addressed the way they felt despite the shared glances and how they always found an excuse to stand, walk, or eat next to each other. She was as close to certain as she could be that he felt the same way as she did. The stillness lingered long enough to alarm her before he leaned into her, his breath fluttering her hair against her left ear. She bit her lip to keep her smile in check.

Still, the nightmare lingered around her like her own shadow. ‘I dreamed of my family.’

One of his hands settled on her waist, his words quiet against her ear. ‘Do you want to tell me what happened?’

She crossed her arms and settled deeper into his chest. ‘Imagining what the nobleman did to them while I was out playing Warden.’

‘Is this something you do while you’re awake too?’

She shrugged. ‘Of course, right?’

He was silent a moment. ‘I should have known. I’m sorry.’

She pulled on a strand of her hair, frustrated. ‘No, I wasn’t trying to…’ She watched the moon for a moment before saying, ‘I know I’m not supposed to, I just can’t help it. The images play before I realise they are. I show myself my brother’s death before I think to stop imagining it.’

He didn’t respond, and shame started creeping up her neck for admitting something like that, even to him. Eventually he said, ‘I don’t think that’s all that strange. I’ve dreamed Duncan’s last moments enough times that I’m wondering if it’s the Fade showing me what really happened. And after seeing something like that…it’s hard to let it stay out of your mind even after you've woken.’ His hand squeezed her hip slightly.

Quiet lowered over them again. Suddenly she didn’t want to wear this sadness, even if she could only turn away from it for a few moments. ‘So about that dragon shit,’ she said, turning her whole body to face him.

‘Maybe we should take some time away from the Darkspawn to track some down.’ His hands reasserted themselves on her waist, one thumb slipping under her chest plate where only her tunic remained to separate their skin.

‘We’ll probably die to this archdemon. I think such a trip would enhance our short lives.’

‘In the way that only legendary shit can.’

She smiled as he laughed down to her, and she loved the way his dark form shook with each laugh. In a short moment, his hands tightened and he was rushing toward her, lips crashing to hers clumsily. She was surprised. She shouldn’t have been, but she was.

Her stomach leapt somewhere in her throat, and despite the rush the kiss gave her, it happened so fast that she didn’t think to kiss him back. 

He pulled back just as suddenly. ‘That was too soon, wasn’t it?’ His hands slipped back to his sides.

‘N-no-it was just-’

‘Maker-I shouldn’t have-’

‘Alistair-’

‘I’ll go back to camp until-’

She put a hand on his cheek just as he turned away. He froze before turning back to her again.

‘Please. Kiss me again.’

She couldn’t see his face clearly in the darkness to fully make out his expression, but he did as she asked. Slowly this time, he snaked his hands up her back to press her against his chest. Just before their lips met, he stopped. Looking up into his eyes, a faint glow of the moon was reflected there, and she found herself overcome with gratitude for this man. That despite everything that had happened, she was here with him. She wanted this moment. Wanted to kiss him now more than anything. Her breath caught, and he closed his eyes, a light smiled danced on her lips before the warmth of him was on her again. 

Even without the surprise of the kiss, her skin lit up like a fire spell. His lips were firm and so warm as they pressed into hers. She placed her open palm on his chest and drug it up the smooth edges of the skin she could feel just under the fabric of his tunic until her fingers reached his neck. Her fingertips danced across the heat there until she circled them around grabbing a handful of his hair. He groaned into her mouth, and she took the opportunity to slip her tongue past his lips, circling his tongue with hers.

He pulled back and shook his head as if clearing it. ‘Sweet Andraste,’ he whispered, eyes still closed as he angled his head to close his lips over her throat.

Her breath came out a whine, and she tilted her head back, sighing deeply. Never had she been so aware of the sensations of her skin as she tracked every movement of his tongue along her neck. She peeked at the stars, shining even beyond the branches around them, two of them glistening brighter than any others. Too bright. Almost as if…

She cried out and jumped away from Alistair. Startled, he turned, pushing her behind him protectively, and followed her gaze, but his human eyes couldn’t see what hers could.

With one crouching leap, she sprang onto the lowest branch of the tree, jumping from one branch to the next, higher toward the figure. ‘You little shit!’ she called as she grabbed his ankle, giving it a yank hard enough that he lost his balance and fell the short distance to the ground before she jumped down herself to land next to him.

Zevran stood and brushed himself off as if they were meeting casually in a tavern. ‘Alistair, good to see you, my friend. Congratulations on acting on those feelings we all knew were burning within you.’

She cut him off, ‘What in the Maker’s name are you doing here?’

‘It is my turn to take watch, and I was simply…watching. Surely there is no fault in that!’ His words rushed together, his voice dripping in his rich Antivan accent.

‘Go back to camp. If I ever catch you anywhere near me while I’m…’ she stumbled over her words, but decided that he could fill in the gap himself. ‘I’ll do things to you that will seriously hinder your ability to reproduce.’

He cast a last glance to Alistair, giving him a wink before waltzing back to camp. He called over his shoulder, ‘I would have left if things really started getting steamy.’

‘No, you wouldn’t have,’ she called at his retreating back.

‘No, I wouldn’t have.’


End file.
